Haha I once spent two hours staring at a crack on my ceiling before I realized it was just a spider web lol

Oof yeah that's a rough one lol. Always stings when someone says your clever stuff isn't working but man those results speak for themselves. Good on you for swallowing the pride and testing it.

You tape the flap to the bottom of the bag? I always tape mine to the back cover, but I leave the flap facing the back too. I mean, the tape is just to keep the bag closed, not to seal out dust completely. If dust is getting in through that top fold, doesn't that mean your bag is too short or not folded tight enough? I've been bagging with the flap on the back for about ten years and my old Valiant issues still look fine.

Did you try Kroil? That stuff freed up my grandpa's old tractor hitch in about five minutes.

I used an old CPU heatsink as a doorstop for like three years before my wife finally threw it out.